Frost Bites / Hypothermic

I wait one more breath

And two more blinks.

I await with swollen fists,

Teeth pressed together.

I wait in agony, lay in black tier,

I let one more,

One single last breath escape my chest,

Around my neck

The hands of death.

In those pathetic moments, when I remind myself

I'm God,

No icy breeze can hurt me 

When I'm buried in frost;

I never lost.

I gave up.

And purposely I torture every spark I used to spread,

Every scream in my ear,

Down my spine.

I hammer nails through my head.

The cracks are silent.

I never cry,

I wait.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait

I can't wait anymore

I'm rotten

Forgotten

The last breath I await

Is useless.

Wouldn't death be happier ,

To take me here and now?

My arms are red and blue and white,

Frost pumps up my veins,

I await two more blinks,

The last pump my bleeding heart is ready to give.

I'd like to sink into heaven,

Violate this last moment,

Though it will never be what I desired.

Though blood dripping from the goddamn nail stuck inside my head

Wouldn't change what I despised so much about myself.

I romanticize

The stinging, painful

Last bites of my life.